Ok here I go on a walk for just a bit will you be home? YES! I'll be home! No need to bring your key I'll be right here not going anywhere NO NOT GOING ANYWHERE WHATSOEVER so please stop asking if I am going anywhere you DO NOT need to bring your key I repeat you do not need your key.
BUT! the other human who said he would be waiting and even made it seem bizarre that we were even questioning whether or not he would be waiting has left to get his hair cut leaving a handy note that the now homeless human and canine who left cannot see because they HAVE BEEN LOCKED OUT OF THE HOUSE---LOCKED OUT OF THEIR SHELTER WHERE WATER IS AND A TOILET IS AND WHERE COMFY BLANKETS ARE...
When we witness this kind of upheaval and confusion because the stupid one who left and forgot to leave a key for the now homeless 2/3rds of the tribe --- when this one who has the key acts like an asshole to the traumatized and exhausted human and canine upon his return because he is defensive---we just know that we must be near to this defensive and wrong one because the other human (the girl human) is still fuming and we know that we are the only friend the stupid ass defensive mean human has and we see it as our duty, as a man dog---a LOYAL man dog, to be near to our brother The Hated One until the conflict passes and we know in our heart that the Angry Bitter One is not offended that we are being with the Forgetful Inconsiderate One because we know in her heart she is happy we are keeping him company.
All in a day's work I suppose,
Murray the Mediating Mongrel
6 comments:
Are you living in my house?
How come I haven't seen you?
Dog door.
I hope he doesn't forget the key to your heart!
You have made me laugh out loud so many times, but this time there's talk of an intervention. That picture, along with the story is hysterical! Thanks for this!
I do get a sense of contriteness from this photo. I should only be so lucky this past weekend.
There was no sincere contrition. But I may be partial.
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