This afternoon Mister Cupcake made a grocery run to Albertsons and when he returned he proudly entered the door holding up the latest issue of People magazine knowing how happy this would make me.
WHY IS SANDRA BULLOCK ON THE COVER OF PEOPLE MAGAZINE WITH HARRIET TUBMAN? I thought for several seconds before I realized that she was NOT on the cover with Harriet Tubman but was actually holding her new baby boy Louis.
Mystery solved.
Then when I was perusing the pages of the literary masterpiece, making sure to keep a keen eye out for any photos of Kate Hudson's new boobs, I happened upon a photo of Robin Wright that showcased her without make-up and was alarmed to read that she is next appearing in a movie called THE CONSTIPATOR.
THAT'S A WEIRD NAME FOR A MOVIE. I WONDER IF IT'S ABOUT A WOMAN WHO DRINKS TOO MUCH METAMUCIL, I thought for several seconds before I realized that the movie she is soon to star in is called The ConSPIRator and NOT The ConSTIPator.
Mystery solved.
It's experiences like these that make me wonder why I never pursued a career as a Private Detective. Or some kind of Wise Shaman.
6 comments:
The whole "Louis" equals Harriet Tubman thing may just be the finest piece of blogging I have ever seen.
What? Kate Hudson got new boobs?
Often when passing strip malls, I see signs advertising Marital Arts studios. Then I read it again and am disappointed that it's only Martial.
I'm with Zadge. The Harriet Tubman reference is pure comic gold.
Priceless, Cupcake. And it's true, as you age the brain reads everything like optical illusions.
Harriet Tubman is brilliance, indeed.
I could star in The Constipator, but I would insist on full makeup and a body double.
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