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Saturday, July 4, 2009

Saturday Shocker

Today, driving on the 405 freeway, I saw THE BRAVEST PERSON IN THE WORLD.

It's true.

He was a person so clear within himself that, regardless of the COMPLETE AND UTTER MAYHEM, RAGE AND F-BOMBS HURLING HIS WAY, he kept his cool. He did not waver. He did not wince. He just kept moving forward.

Much like our Founding Fathers except without those white wigs that you could almost hear begging for conditioner.

This person, actually it was TWO people but I was more focused on THE DRIVER. He was a man who looked a little like Tim Conway---unassuming and presumably nice---and she was his stalwart cohort, sitting next to him all calm and determined. They were driving a thimble-sized relatively old Mazda or Toyota and they were on the portion of the 405 freeway where approximately nine thousand freeways converge. This is the part of the 405 that is written about in the news and in hell. I'm sure I've seen Green Berets training there and if they ever remake the chariot race in Ben Hur, this is the spot they'll use. It is F-ed up, this spot. And if you combine this spot with July 4th and the fact that it is the direct route to the beach, well, you've got trouble.

Back to THE BRAVEST PERSON IN THE WORLD. There he was---surrounded by every blood thirsty asshole driver you could imagine bearing down on him, honking and flipping him off, with the following sign in HUGE BRIGHT SCARLET RED letters in his back windshield:


Believe me when I tell you that I have seen the ghost of Hester Prynne and she is a brave nebbish maneuvering the concrete jungle that is Los Angeles.

Stand Proud,
Trini the Oil Guzzling Pacer


linlah said...

Yes, I can see it now, Green Berets, in Ben Hur chariots headed for the beach...going very slowly.

Cupcake Murphy said...

You have no idea!! It was like nothing I have ever seen. I just loved these people so much. I wish I could have given them some sort of medal.