Cooper Being Malcom Macdowell In A Clockwork Orange

He's all, "ANIMAL CRUELTY---YOU'RE GOING STRAIGHT TO HELL!" because we taped his eyes open and forced him to stare at a photograph of Ann Coulter while blasting Pat Metheny albums.

And we were like, "Mister and Missus have to find some way to entertain themselves without spending their hard earned cash, lil pup. Now, shut your snout---here comes the really jazzy part where it sounds like a trillion baby birds imitating a rhinestone embossed jackhammer!"

Until Next Time,
Lead Reporter for The Granola Is Deceptively Fattening Press