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Friday, February 20, 2009

Bear Grylls Is So Brave He Eats Bear Poop = True

We've started off our GLORIOUS WEEKEND by doing the usual and incredibly satisfying activities:

1. Walk through neighborhood conducting Nicest House, Creepiest House Contest
2. Evaluation, reconstruction and freshening up of all candles to prepare the house before dinner
3. Eat dinner
4. Watch a Man vs Wild with Bear Grylls that we have not seen yet

Just when I'm thinking "I don't think it's possible to be more content this evening" Bear starts eating a big pile of bear poop and he follows this activity up with giving us advice about what to do if a brown bear is "coming at you" which involves RUNNING and throwing something down "for it to sniff" and I'm thinking:

NUMBER ONE: PLEASE PLEASE no never never ever have me be like Bear and be in the Romanian forest near Transylvania eating bear doo.

NUMBER TWO: If I am EVER even CLOSE to a bear please make sure that I, unlike Bear Grylls, have a machine gun, Hummer and many hundreds of helpers with guns to keep me good and gosh darn safe.

NUMBER THREE: Instead of going into the woods all by my lonesome like Bear, please let me be in the warmth of my tub drinking my tea waiting to eat my Peppermint Patties because I would FREEZE WITH TERROR if I did what Bear Grylls does.

My husband, on the other hand, plays the important role of poking holes in Bear's strategies and situations and activities which can be very precarious and highly unbelievable and not unlike some of our camping trips. According to my husband.

And that's why we LOVE to start the weekend off watching Man vs Wild.

Dutifully yours,
Junior Senator from somewhere serious

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Have you ever wondered where he got the name "bear?" He admitted that it's a lifelong habit for him: eating bear poop. He just can't stay away! He said it's the most delicious thing in the world!