Tuesday Expert Advice

Dear Cupcake,

I think I've really blown it this time and I hope you can help.

Recently I stopped at a very fancy coffee place in Brentwood and as I was standing in line I noticed a sign that said:

WE WILL GLADLY TAKE YOUR ORDER AFTER YOU HAVE FINISHED YOUR PHONE CALL

I thought this was so darn clever that I grabbed the little notebook I keep in my purse and I jotted it down. Turns out this was a mistake because apparently the whole WE WILL GLADLY TAKE YOUR ORDER thing encompasses other activities like:

WE WILL GLADLY TAKE YOUR ORDER WHEN YOU HAVE FINISHED SCRIBBLING IN YOUR PATHETIC LITTLE NOTEBOOK YOU IGNORANT SPY

Who knew, right? Not me. Initially I thought I HATE THESE JACKASSES and made a master plan to never return but then I remembered they have my favorite non-brick-light-as-feather scones that I cannot live without. Do you think if I write a formal letter of apology and promise to pay perfect attention when I am waiting in line that they will forgive me?
---I'm Not Rude In LA

Dear Rude,
No.
Good Luck,
Cupcake