I have been tirelessly working in the laboratory using my Bunsen burner and have proven the following in my controversial Sodium-Free Soup Experiments of 2009.
Things you can eat/slurp that are more delicious than Sodium-Free Soup:
1. Gutter runoff with twigs, sticks and corroded matchsticks
2. Lukewarm evaporated milk with old socks (aka Old Socks Broth)
3. Leftover bathwater
Things you can do rather than eat/slurp Sodium-Free Soup:
1. Go into your bathroom, stand in front of the mirror and say to yourself I WILL NEVER KNOW TRUE HAPPINESS
2. Start watching Wheel Of Fortune in your spare time and then bring it up in conversation at EVERY opportunity but make sure you refer to it as, simply, "Wheel"
3. Wear only beige
Be well, cast your spell,
Inspector Trudy T. Taste